i can't belive i sat there and thought about each question on that survey. i guess i wanted it to be unique...like me!

note: please take time to read my survey. it took my about 4 hours to do. i was at the library from 5pm to 8:45pm filling it out. if you have any questions or comments about the survey, use my tag board. that's why twig put it there.

this hike should be fun on sunday. i've hike before and i've camped before. but i never hiked up a mountain and camped there. with me, mixing things is always fun. like...fire and flammable things...burritos and my digestive system...my accident prone body and golf carts...fire and flammable things...just to name a few.

001. What is your name: dwayne edward volckmann
002. Spell your name Backwards: nnamkclov drawde enyawd
003. Date of birth: July 13th 1981
004. Male or female: Male
005. Astrological sign: Cancer
006. Nicknames: shwayne (new), bigD, dwayne-wayne, bigdork, bizzyD, bizzyD to the wizzane, bizzyD to the wizzle izzle, lostboy, howard the duck, volcan, volkswagon, jeta, return of the jeda, rabbit,
007. Occupation: draftsperson, surveyor, (future) civil engineer
008. Height: 6'-1(3/4)"
009. Weight: 220lbs (sad but true)
010. Hair color: dirty blonde, brown, poop color
011. Eye color: first blue, then green, now hazel
012. Where were you born: Goshen, New York
013. where do you reside now: Schenectady, New York
014. Age: 22
015. Screen names: bigdthirteen
016. E-mail address: bigD_is_lost@hotmail.com
017. why were you named what you are? my mom wanted Shawn, my dad wanted Wayne (after Wayne Newton), so they compromised on Dwayne (my father's best friend)
018. What is your lj name: not sure what you mean
019. What does your lj name stand for: i'd let you know if i knew what it was
020. Pets: unfortunately, all animals that come within a short distance of me or my car tend to die. so, i have no pets, anymore.
021. Number of candles you blew out on your last birthday cake: i think it's always one candle
022. Piercings: i cut my nipple with my fingernail years ago, does that count?
023. Tattoo's: nope
024. Shoe size: 11
025. Righty or lefty: lefty
026. Wearing: clothes
027.Hearing: people typing and talking
028. Feeling: good because i'm finally doing this survey. i wanted to to this for awhile
029. Eating/drinking: ummm, if you haven't noticed, i'm in a library computer lab.

~Guys/Girls/Love/Kissing/And Other Stuff~

061. Have you ever been in love: if i was, i made a mistake
062. How many people have you said I love you to: mostly parents or relatives, and my now ex-girlfriend
063. How many people have you been in REAL love with: i only had one girlfriend, and believe me it wasn't real!
064. How many people have you kissed: on the lips, only one
065. Have you ever kissed someone of the same sex: umm, no
066. How many people have you dated: 1
067. What do you look for in a guy/girl: if she truly seeks after God, likes the same things i like, can compliment the path God has me on, and actually finds me attractive...then she's a keeper
068. What's the first thing you notice about the opposite sex: honestly, their face. eyes and lips can be a real turn on.
069. What type of guy/girl do you usually go for: someone who's easy to talk to...outgoing, i guess.
073. Do you have a crush right now: yep, but i think she's seein' someone
074. If so who is it: it's...someone i know 
075. Do you believe in love at first sight: we should love everyone we see (to paraphrase the bible)
076. Do you remember your first love: Who could forget Jesus
077. Who is the first person you kissed: my only ex-girlfriend
079. Do you believe in soul mates: yes, in a way
080. If so do you believe you'll ever find yours: God will provide

~Family Stuff~

104. How many siblings do you have: 3 brothers (by blood) and 1 step-sister
105. What are your parents names: jackie and chris (i forgot my birth dad's name)
106. what are your siblings names: Shawn, Michael, Joshua, Jaime
107. How many siblings does your mother have: 3
108. How many siblings does your father have: no clue
109. Where are your parents from: mom, middletown(ny). dad, no clue.
110. Is your family close: mom's side, yes. dad's side, no. as you can see by questions 107, 108, & 109.
111. Does your family get together for holidays: only direct family
112. Do you have a drunk uncle: don't think so. but if so, they never told me.
113. Any medical problems run through your family: diabetes
114. Does someone in your family wear a toupee: no, but they are bald.
115. Do you have any nieces or nephews: yep. quite a few.
116. Are your parents divorced: yes
117. Do you have step parents: i think so, but no one ever clerified whether my suspicions are true or not
118. Has your family ever disowned another member of your family: i wouldn't know
120. Did some of your family come to America from another country: if you go back far enough i'm sure they did. this must be a trick question

_Music Stuff_

121. What song do you swear was written about you or your life: my life is too dwaynish to write a song about
122. What's the most embarrassing cd you own: some stupid sampler cd, where is that thing anyway?
123. What's the best cd you own: tough, either Veronica or Redeem
124. What song do you absolutely hate: anything by Brittany Spears
125. Do you sing in the shower: yes, but not too loud
126. What song reminds you of that special someone: that Veronica song that goes, "You belong to me. I belong to you. We belong together; In everything we do..."

_Favorites_

152. Color: forest green...almost black but with a green hue
153. Lucky number: 13. there's a reason why too.
154. Song: "My friend, My friend. He's got a knife"...oh the memories
155. fav show: CSI, CSI-maimi, 24 HOURS
156. School: whatever or wherever it is...i haven't seen it yet
157. Band/singer/artist: Jason Gay...because he gives me nice clothes
158. Animal: cats...but i want a snake...but it would die
159. Outfit: Lee Dungarees and In-Side-Out-Soul-Fest tee-shirt or Redeem tee-shirt
161. Movie: Lord of the Rings
162. Pair of shoes: Vans (for syle), New Balance (for comfort)
163. Cartoon: Chalk Zone...it fits my personality
164. Actor: Chris Farley...God rest his soul
165. Actress: The bolistics girl on CSI-miami. GOURGEOUS!!
166. Potato chip: Ruffle, Barbeque (brands are irrelivent)
167. Drink: chocolate milk
168. Soda or Pop: Soda
169. Holiday: Christmas. HAPPY BIRTHDAY JESUS!!
170. Perfume/cologne: Polo Sport
171. Pizza topping: sausage
172. Jello flavor: cherry
173. Fav food: pizza
174. Card Game: texas holdem
175. Video game: SPLINTER CELL!!!! it should have been longer
176. Website: www.homestarrunner.com
177. Book: Tom Clancy stuff is good but the Bible rules all
178. Computer game: the first version of civilization.
179. Number: 13
180. Cereal: cheerios actually
181. Comedian: Chris Farely
182. Dessert: PIE!!! (apple pie to be specific)
183. Disney character: Goofy...makes sense
184. Clothing store: not sure, i don't shop much
185. Past time: watching movies and/or long thought provoking conversations
186. Teacher: My structures proffesor from HVCC. great teacher and the sound effects were epic
187. Childhood toy: playing cards, marbles, dominoes, tape, and string (i used all of these to create my own working mechanical contraptions)
188. Carnival game/ride: none. (wow this survey is long)
189. Candy bar: snickers, m&m's with nuts
190. Magazine: GMR
191. Salad dressing: italian
192. Thing to do on the weekend: hang with friends and play texas holdem
193. Hot drink: hot chocolate
194. Season: Spring, Fall (milder climate)
195. Sport to watch: i like 'em all
196. Person to talk to online: Cary Bonnell (it's been awhile)

_Your Bedroom/Sleeping Habits_

197. What color are your sheets: dark blue
198. What color are your bedroom walls: white
199. Do you have posters on your wall: no, but i want one now
200. If so of what: cool bands i like and things that make you think
201. Do you have a tv in your bedroom: no
202. How many pillows are on your bed: 1
203. What do you normally sleep in: whatever i wore that day
204. Describe your favorite pair of pajamas: very loose and comfy
205. What size bed do you have: my feet hang off it
206. Do you have a waterbed/bunkbed/daybed: no
207. Do you have your own phone line in your bedroom: no
209. Describe the last nightmare you had: i was parylized and couldn't breath or scream with no one to save me
210. Do you sleep with stuffed animals: my mom gave me a teddy bear, so yes
211. How many people can comfortably sleep comfortatly in your bed? one small person. and i am not small.
212. Do you sleep in any unusual positions: i'd like to think so
213. Do you have to share your bedroom with a sibling: i used to, now i have my own place
214. Do you snore: i hope not
215. How about drool?: sometimes
216. Do you have an alarm clock in your room: yes.
217. What color is the carpet in your room: yellow. like pee pee
218. What's under your bed: shoes and sneakers

_This or that_

219. Loser/wannabe: i'd rather be a loser than a wannabe
220. Doughnuts/bagels: bagels
221. Day/night: day
222. Wicked witch of the east/wicked witch of the west?: witches suck
223. Heaven/hell: let's be logical...heaven
224. Make love/have sex: make love
225. Coffee/tea: tea, coffee...if it didn't hurt my stomach and wasn't addicting
226. Hamburgers/hotdogs: burgers (cheese too)
227. Rap/rock: Rap is Crap...Rock is the way to Roll
228. Britney/Christina: i'd rather throw up
229. Swiss cheese/american cheese: swiss
230. Real World/Road Rules: Real world
231. Backstreet Boys/*Nsync: see #228
232. Silver/gold: that's like saying,"building materail or pavement?"
233. Nike/Adidas: adidas...nike is the anti-christ
234. McDonalds/Taco Bell: Yo ciero Taco Bell!!
235. Sweet/sour: sweet
236. Punk/emo: there is no emo, although i like music that gets classifed as emo.
237. Hot/cold: cool
238. Winter/summer: winter is pretty
239. Spring/fall: tough one...both
240. Operas/plays: play
241. Read/watch tv: i want to say read but it's easier to watch tv
242. Cd's/tapes: cd
243. Dvd's/vhs: dvd
244. Old/new: odd one, ay!!
245. Shorts/skirts: on my...shorts, on her...skirts
246. Pink/red: red
247. Colored pictures/black and white photos: color
248. Meat/vegetables: meat
249. Mexican food/chinese food: chinese
250. Commercials/infomercials: commercials
251. Scary movies/comedies: comedies
252. Bikinis/one piece bathing suits: bikinis
253. Sandals/tennis shoes: Vans
254. Dogs/cats: cats are more civilized
255. Unicorns/fairies: niether exist so it doesn't matter
256. Water/land: land
257. Sugar/spice: spice...more veriety that way
258. Black/white: black
259. ribbons/bows: ribbons can be kinky
260. Chicken/beef: chicken
261. Colored christmas lights/regular white christmas lights: white
262. Cars/trucks: cars
263. Austin Powers/James Bond: bond
264. Popcorn/pretzels: popcorn
265. Hip/hop: it's a trck question!!!
266. Passionate kiss/peck: a peck that leads to a passionate kiss
267. WWE wrestling/ real wrestling: men in spandex is out man
268. Back rub/foot massage: back rub
269. Picture frames/photo albums: album
270. Pens/pencils: pencils...more forgiving

_What Is Your Opinion Of The Following_

271. Eminem: needs to get saved
272. Virgins: pure. the way God created us to be
273. God: Everyone should get to know Him more
274. The Osbournes: Ozzy needs to be put on medication to help with his medication
275. Reality TV: sitcoms are better
276. J.Lo: buy a whole outfit
277. Religion: is stupid, what you need is a relationship with God
278. Emo music: is interesting stuff
279. Valentine's Day: i've never had a true valentine sweetheart
280. Christina Aguilera's comeback: i never knew or cared
281. Homosexuals: confused people who need to realize the truth
282. Abortion: murder. God gave us life, why try to take it away?
283. Inter-racial relationships: why else would God make us differnet?
284. Murder: "thou shall not..."
285. Death: "for me, to live is Christ, to die is gain" AMEN JOEY!
286. Obesity: america has a problem with it
287. Pre-marital sex: too much pain to be worth it
288. Terrorism: it only exists if you let it
289. Pornography: see #287
290. Fortune Tellers: can be right but that doesn't mean it's good
291. Threesomes: God never intended it.
292. Prostitution: see #287
293. Politics: i think of religious people
294. Country music: not my style
295. George W. Bush: a true leader
296. Cloning: leave creation to the pro. God Himself
297. Britney's boobs: not interested
298. Gas prices in America: Nyquil is over $100 per gallon. think on this!

_Name Game_

What Do You Think Of When You Hear These Common Names?...

299. Jack: and the beanstalk
300. Tiffany: arbuckle
301. Ben: stiller
302. Maria: fatato
303. Jennifer: Garner..Beth likes her..Joe..Home..wow it's 8pm
304. Nicole: Greives (youth group, back in the day)
305. Amy: Spinelli (high school ninth grade crush)
306. Adam: and Eve
307. Richard: Simons (put some pants on)
308. Justin: Savoey
309. Arnold: Governor of CA
310. Tom: Hanks
311. Melissa: Guitarist from Superchick (cutey!!)
312. Charlotte: Hornets
313. Harold: Sutton (Maryland Youth Camp)
314. John: Gatti (man-o-God)
315. Joel: Fatato
316. Vanessa: sexy name
317. Michelle: another sexy name
318. Kevin: Kelley (co-worker)
319. Brent: wow, nothing.
320. Jake: Shaffer
321. Billy: Rice (golf and bowling buddy from my work)
322. Sarah: ex-girlfriend
323. Natalie: goth girl from high school...she was strangley attractive
324. Christy: Yamaguchi (figure skater)
325. Nick: Nack
326. Linda: Paulley
327. Taylor: Randal Lex's son
328. Jessica: Simpson
329. Jamie: McIntyre
330. Adrian: Rocky - all the way

_Have You Ever...._

331. Mooned anyone: my butt always stayed hidden (unless i poop)
332. Been on a diet: wanted to but never started to
333. Been to a foreign country: Canada, Mexico, the U.S. can be foriegn
334. Broken a bone: yes, playing hackysack!! tough sport
335. Swallowed a tooth/cap/filling: yep
336. Swear at a teacher: yep
337. Talked on instant messages: i just did, just now!!
338. Got in a fight: nope
339. Dated a teacher: no, but i wanted to
340. Laughed so hard you peed your pants: a couple times
341. Thought about killing your enemy: yes, and he WILL die
342. Gone skinny dipping: yeah, but it felt kind of gay. there were no girls...just me and nate
343. Met another lj member in the flesh: lj=???
344. Told a little white lie: those things can grow out of hand, i know from experience
345. Told a secret you swore not to tell: no
346. Stolen anything: yes
347. Misused a swear word and it sounded absolutely stupid: that's why i'm dwaynish
348. Been on TV: no
349. Been on the radio: no
350. Been in a mosh pit: once or twice
351. Been to a concert: lots
352. Dated one of your best friends: i hope to become best frinds before i date her
353. Loved someone so much it makes you cry: i miss crying b/c of that reason
354. Deceived somebody close to you: uh-huh. sorry everyone
355. Broken the law: minor things here and there
356. Been to a rodeo: no
357. Been on a talk show: not yet
358. Been on a game show: not yet
359. Hich Hiked: nope
360. Got to ride on a fire truck: sit in one...yes (ride...no)
361. Came close to dying: mostly at the wheel of my car...b/c i fell asleep (i can count 4 times off the top of my head)
362. Cheated on a bf/gf: never!
363. Gave someone a piggy back ride: i love you Joshua
364. Terrorized a babysitter: no, but i did terrorize my brother in front of the babysitter
365. Made a mud pie: yes
366. Had a dream that you're falling off a cliff: not from a cliff, just falling through the air
367. Snuck out of the house at night: no
368. Been so drunk you don't remember your name: no
369. Had an eating disorder: i think i do
370. Felt like you didn't belong: school sucked man
371. Felt like the 3rd wheel: too many times to count
372. Smoked: cigars are my best friend
373. Done drugs: only advil, tylenol
374. Been arrested: no
375. Had your tonsils removed: no
376. Gone to camp: yes
377. Won a bet: i never accepted any
378. Written a love letter: yes, but never gave it to her
379. Gone out of your way to be with the one you love: mmm hm
380. Written a love poem: yeah, but only i saw them
381. Kissed in the rain: no, but now i want to.
382. Slow danced with someone you love: i only slow danced once...and it was after i found out she didn't "like" me
383. Participated in an orgy: not likely
384. Faked an orgasm: no, i'm 100% real moan and groan
385. Stolen a kiss: no, i have to have them given to me
386. Asked a friend for relationship advice: many times
387. Had a friend steal your bf/gf: no
388. Watched the sunset/rise with someone you love: yes
389. Gotten a speeding ticket: in my younger years
390. Done jail time: interesting thought, but no
391. Had to wear a uniform to work: pricechopper...never again
392. Won a trophy: pine wood durby, band competition
393. Thrown up in public: bad memory, but yes
394. Bowled a perfect game: no, but i have witnessed one
395. Failed/got held back: failed a few...not held back
396. Got perfect attendance in grade school: K-6th. stupid strep throught
397. Roasted pumpkin seeds: no
398. Taken ballet/karate lessons: no
399. Attempted suicide: no
400. Cut yourself: accidentilly? much. suicide? no.

I started out the day ok...but then I got to work. I was all positive and motivated until everyone else's pissy attitudes rubbed off on me. I stayed ok for the most part. Certain things got me frustrated though. Nothing big, just pet peeves.

my schedule is packed this memorial day weekend. friday there's a worship band playing and Bygrace is going to see them (I may or may not go) For those who don't know, Bygrace is a college and career type group that does alot of cool stuff. Some of us are also going to the Albany City Rescue Mission on saturday. Then sunday shortly after church i'm going with some more Bygrace people to the adirondacks to hike up a mountain and camp out overnight. fun, fun, fun.

there are some cases where i'll be online alot. but i'm usually online between 4:00 and 6:00 pm. mon. through fri.. in case you want to im me.

i'm im-ing joey (spina) right now. i'm bad at miltitasking. hehe, and spelling. i'm trying to blog at the same time. it's proving to be difficult. but for your entertainment i'll keep trying.

thanks for all the im names. and keep 'em coming. the more the merrier...merryer.....mare.ree.errrrr. bare with me. hey, cool, this thing has spell check. i just noticed. i've been blogging for months and i just noticed...on that note i have the following prayer requests...J/K

there's alot to blog about but i'm not sure if you want to hear it all. stuff happened but it wasn't exciting. today was pretty normal. you probably only like the exciting stuff i blog about, right?

i'm goin to email peeps. keep it real (just try not to step in it)

who would have thought that the library was NOT a quiet place? these teens in the computer lab are annoying. too much giggling.

if anyone wants to know, my im is bigdthirteen. use my tag board and let me know yours so i can add it to my buddy list.

so, i've been all preoccupied about someone i want to date. i was questioning whether God wanted me to remain single or not, b/c i have alot of growing up to do before i'm ready to. and now i know his answer. yes, remain single! i spent all this time worrying about this dilema about if i should wait or not, or tell her how i feel. and if my sources are correct she's dating someone already. which is fine. it just made the answer to my question more obvious. and all that time worrying was pointless. which proves that i do have some growing up to do. i'm such an eighth grader...like those annoying teeny boppers.

walker, i read your tag. i wish i could IM but every attempt has failed. i thought it might work with aim express but i can't download anything off the internet. this library is anal.

also, what do you want to do today? let me know. either try calling my apartment and leave a message...or leave a message on my tag board...or if you want you can go to my place from school and i'll be there between 5:30 and 6pm. i wouldn't mind roller blading around or visiting caz at his work.

i'm going home now. it's 4:50. i should be there by 5:30. in case you want to meet me there.

(to the rest of you, i'll blog later. there's alot to blog about. but at the same time there's not enough time to blog because if all the things that are going on.)

at work. so this'll be short.

played poker last night. from 7-10pm. spina put in 3 bucks. everyone alse put in 5. i ended up owing joe spina 43 cents. the sad part is i only had 41 cents and twenty dola. so i still owe him 2 cents.

i might play poker again tonight. higher stakes. 25 dola to buy in. with ten peeps playin that's 250 dolas in the pot. winner gets 75%(+or-200). 2nd place gets 25%(+or-50). everyone esle gets none. should be interesting...if i actually play.

i have to say that twig is doing a good jeeourb on the trinity website. i'm sure there's alot more stuff to do but i'm excited that it's getting done. and who'd be better to do it than the twig himself!?

i also have to say that these two men in the library computer room are freaking annoying. the one guy is old and a computer idiot...i mean, he's computer illiterate. the other guy is fat and loud and yelling at him, trying to tell him what to do. the old guy can't figure out how to "double click" (yeah, it's that bad). and the fat guy has no patience so he'll yelling, "click on it!"

old guy: "i did!"

fat guy: "no, double click on it?"

old guy: "what!?"

fat guy: "let me do it!"

old guy: "no, i got it!"

fat guy: "i could do it in half the time!"

old guy: "i want to figure it out."

fat guy: "alright already!"

old guy: (click)

fat guy: "NO, DOUBLE CLICK!!!"

and it goes on like that for a couple minutes. it's really loud and disturbing. people started to laugh out loud. either that or they walked out of the room one by one glaring at them.

i got a haircut today. i confused the haircut lady. i told her i liked my hair with volume so she put gel in it and pulled it up. then i said i liked it down and she got confuzzled. i can never decide how i want my hair. but she was attractive so i tipped her. kind of shallow, huh? i would have tipped her even if she wasn't! she deserved it b/c she could deal with me. and i know i can be hard to deal with. sometimes i can't even handle myself. but that's a whole different blog entry.

i emailed a bunch of people in my address book to see if they still have the same email addresses. and some of them responded. now we've been emailing again. yay, people like me!

amanda from syracuse is one such person (i can never remember her last name). she lives in australia now. that's a really cool place for a really cool person.

lacy miller is another such person. if any of you went to the teen camp in maryland (no, not the maryland in new jersey) you might remember her. we both like playing the omish card game "dutch blitz". but neither one of us can find people that really get into it like we do.

oh yeah, cary bonnell. i can't forget cary. she's a great friend. and she's always really busy. God's doing alot in her life right now. and satan would like nothing more than to change that. if you get a chance, pray for her. i know she'd appreciate it.


i'm realizing now how many friends i have. there's alot of them. and they are all really good friends. some people have friends that are kind of sketchy. i have had a few myself. but God's put me around alot of really good people.

but what if God called me away from all my friends? what if He had work for me to do that was not near any of them? and i wouldn't be able to get in touch often? i wonder if i could handle that? right now i need my friends. if they're not there i get lonely, and even depressed. i feel like i depend on them so much right now i wouldn't be able to do it. i would want to do what God says. but it's such a tough situation.

i went to my blog site and it was blank. so i'm testing the post and publish stuff to see if it will reappear if i post a message. hopefully all will go well.

what the heck was i doing yesturday. those are some retarted drawings of...whatever.
(look up the definition of dufus and there's a picture of me)

so, the brothers schmaper are coming home this weekend. half of them are already here. the other half are going to be here soon. i'm hangin' out with the whole of them tomorrow. should be cool.

there's alot i'd like to say but i feel like i shouldn't say it here. i wish i could let it all out. i shouldn't though. if some of the people whom i wrote about happened to stumble apon my blog site they would probably get upset. so i guess i'm going to keep my mouth shut.

___________
( ___ ___ )
( (_*_) (_*_) )
( (__) )
( (_____) )
(___________)

this just convinced me that i need a girlfriend

___ ___
(_*_)-(_*_)
!!
( )
(-------)

this is fun!!

i'm just being dwaynish
^ ^
* *
(_)
(------)

i must appologize to twig. i tried drawing this character out of the symbols on my keyboard. it was somewhat like:
^ ^
* _ *
(_)
___

but more complicated. and when i posted it on the comment board it got all messed up and now whenever someone checks the comments on his blog they will see this hideous thing that's all mangled and crappy looking.

sorry twig

what ralph meant to say about the job was that i'll be getting a call in three weeks to set up an interview. i double checked with him last night. old men can be so misleading.

just to let you know i have another online journal. just click the first link at the top left. i'm probably not going to actually post on it too often. i just signed up on xanga so i could comment on other people's sites. for example, dave hehir has a new journal on xanga. spina has had one for awhile. who knows, maybe twig will have a new site to post on soon...hint...hint.

work was whatever. i don't care to say anything about it.

i was watching a movie with joe last night and i got a phone call. it was ralph scorza. the old guy at trinity with the purple suits. he always says "hi, guy!" or "hey, guy!". he's not there much. he goes to florida alot. anyway, he told me a few weeks ago that his cousin was an engineer. and he took my resume to his cousin b/c he was looking for someone to hire. so ralph calls me last night and tells me i've got the job already. i guess i start in three weeks.

isn't there usually an interview? am i qualified? and where is this place? i hope this is a God thing happening here. it sounds awesome. yet i need to know more before i can be confident that this is the right thing for me.

i was up for 21 hours on saturday. holy mary mother of God i was tired.

well, so far the money isn't worth the golf i play. on saturday i had one good hole. it was a par 3. i hit the first shot just off the green into a bunker/sand trap/whatever you want to call those annoying pieces of shiznit. my second shot out of the sand was uber. i took a full swing and the ball went within a few feet of the hole. putted it in for a par. other than that, i probably shouldn't play golf.

work was bearable. i had work for the whole day. i know, i was shocked too. i even have some left over for tomorrow. people from work are golfing right now. i just realized this. they go out every monday after work.

went to ByGrace with walker sunday. i liked it. they talked about relationships and hooking up (to paraphrase). i got alot of good stuff out of it. my problem is i feel like i can't use the knowledge correctly. i figure i'll screw something up. lately i've felt hopeless when it comes to girls. i get too weird around them. it's hard to be myself, no matter how hard i try. my fear is that i AM being myself and that awkward feeling is always going to be there.

i wish i was Joe Cool with the ladies. like strong bad. now there's a ladies man! i want to tell strong bad the same thing joe told me once. "if i were a girl, i'd be all over you!"